I don’t even know what to say lately. The days are just a blur. When people ask how I’m feeling, I just smile and say we’re doing all right. This is an obvious lie, but how do I even begin to convey the mixed emotions welled up inside of me? I’m often scared to sleep. I used to take a short nap while Jack was napping but lately I’ve been plagued with terrible, terrible dreams that leave me anxious and scared. Terrible and wonderful, for I do get to see baby Amelia in them.
The gospel of Jesus Christ and knowing of God’s eternal plan should keep us happy and positive, but as the reality of the situation sets in that becomes increasingly difficult. But I’ve come to terms that it’s okay to cry and mourn for a time; we wouldn’t be human if we didn’t. And in the end, it’s opposition and trials like this that draw us closer as a family and closer to God and His presence here on earth.
Alex, you are so amazing! How you can be going through such a hard time, with such courage and openness is beyond me. You are truly a choice daughter of God and Amelia is lucky to have you as her mother.
I love reading your posts. They always give me the courage to push through the hard times and really appreciate the good ones. You are a choice spirit; noble and great. Thank you for sharing so much of yourself in this blog.
I’m so sorry that you have to go through this hard trial. I cry every time I read about how hard it is for you. It breaks my heart. I just want you to know that I pray for you every day. I want so badly to help you and it’s the only way I know how…
I believe in you and know that with the Lords help you will make it through this trial. Good luck with this coming week and know, we are all praying for you.